Things I Would Rawther Not Do (In No Particular Order):

  • Wake up to a clock.  I find it extremely rude no matter what “nice sound” I try to wake up to.  I’m going to start lobbying for time to revolve around me officially, since it already does unofficially.
  • Shave my legs.  And Nair or Neet or whatever is not just as good and it takes longer, and frankly, my legs are so fetchin’ big, it takes too damn much of the stuff!
  • Style my hair.  Science needs an answer for bed head.
  • Look at one more blasted house.  Just give me one already, ok?  I’m tired of having my heart broken and my dreams shattered.
  • Make lunches in the morning.  Or at night.  Can’t they just make themselves?
  • Wait 8 days to see the premier of “House” on the internet since I don’t have t.v.
  • Have zits.
  • Wear lotion so my hands don’t feel like alligator skin.  Can’t I just have perfect skin?
  • Continue this antibiotic that is making my mouth raw and me itch all over.  They should just prescribe Zithromax for EVERYTHING.  Honestly, how am I supposed to remember 3x a day until it’s gone?  I barely remember 2x a day for my own sanity and self-preservation!  Plus, I’m feeling the burning in my face come back so it’s obviously not working anyway.
  • Sleep at all.  Unless it’s a nap and no one is around to interrupt me.  Because I have reading to do for homework.  Books and magazines to read for leisure.  Scriptures to read and study.  Manuals to complete.  Confessions to write down.  Movies to watch.  Food to cook.  Stuff to clean.  Kids to chauffeur and make their lives miserable because they can’t watch TV in the morning, EVER.  Service to do.  Scouts to pretend like I’m necessary for.  Houses to fall in love with and make offers on and wait forever to find out I did not get.  Letters to write.  I could go on, but I was already writing that other list I started!
  • Take recycling in.  Really.  I love recycling.  I’m the recycling nazi in our house.  But in spite of the fact that the whole state is big on it and even mandates it for homeowners, since I live in an apartment I have no recycling resources.  No bin to just dump it in outside and have the recycling truck come haul it off every week (or whatever).
  • Use the bathroom.  Sometimes, I’m just too tired and I just don’t understand why science has not yet come up with a way for someone else to do it for me!  Why do I have to get out of my bed after I’ve gotten all comfy?
  • Stop writing this blog to go read my homework.