Awhile back there was a book called "The Rules". I think it was about how to get a man. I don't really know because by then I already had one! However, if you've recently started seeing someone, or if you're deciding if you should fish or cut bait – make sure he knows about these rules because they're the deal-breakers. If you would like to give a "3 Strikes" approach to the situation that's up to you, but if there is consistent breaking of the rules or if rule #5 is broken at any time, RUN, do not walk, to the nearest "It's not me, it's you…" conversation. Or the police. Whichever is deemed appropriate by your situation.
Seriously. If you lie, you’re toast. Unless you’re lying to me that you have to work tomorrow (which might be say, MLKJr. Day and EVERYBODY but you has it off) when you really don’t and then secretly don’t set the alarm so we can wake up together… That kind of lie would be okay.
If you cheated on someone with me, I can pretty much bet with 100% certainty that this is the way you will leave me. Plus, it is a form of lying. Which just about beats out everything.
You treat your mom like crap.
Tsk, tsk… I can read the future by the way you treat her, you know. Don’t think I haven’t noticed!
User-Maintenance Lessons Drop-Out
If you fail to complete the training course I put you through in the beginning of our relationship on how to remember important dates and other special occasions, Sayonara!
Hands are not for hitting!
Or choking, slapping, punching, and any other form of physical harm. There is no “three strikes” attitude on this, either.