Snarker’s Block

I can’t think of anything funny to say.  I’m hoping something comes out during my word vomit here, because I’m starting to worry about myself!

Things are moving right along with the house.  Our inspections are getting done, still waiting to hear if they’re going to clean the pool they nastied up with the grass clippings, and picking paint has been a disaster.  I find all these colors I LOVE, and I find coordinating colors (I think!) that I want to use, but what do you use it on?  And how do I know if I’m picking the right color?  Do I want a stone more than I want a yellow-ish hue?  I’m going for the old adobe look, except for the fact that the walls are sheetrock and not plaster, and I can’t decide which color is not too light so that you can’t tell what I’m going for, and not too dark so you feel like the place is closing in on you.  I need an interior design goddess to visit me, and fast!

And then there’s the matter of the appliances.  I’ve picked my fridge, for reals this time, but the washer & dryer are making me crazy!  I know I want front loaders.  I know I don’t want them to cost more than $1500 including tax for the pair.  And they can’t be ugly, and the washer has to be at least 4 cu. ft. and dryer 7 cu. ft.  I narrowed down the ones I like to a GE set, a Bosch Nexxt set, and a Whirlpool Duet set.  It’s the fitting in my price range I’m running into trouble with.  And I don’t know what it is, but last time I tried this I could find all kinds of discounts everywhere and now I can’t find any!

And I hate picking out the paint.  It’s so permanent.  What if I start painting and go “OH CRAP!!  It’s too ___!!!” and then I’m stuck until we can afford to repaint!  I just want to pick all the colors I love and have the paint fairy pick out what the perfect combination of it all is.  Is that too much to ask?  No.  I didn’t think so, either.

Back to the paint, how do you know if you have the right color?  And what is better, soft gloss or semi-gloss?  Believe it or not, there is a difference.  I want whatever I can scrub without redistributing color and dying my Magic Eraser the same color as the walls.  And whoever said that you can scrub Flat paint is a big, fat liar.

(Have you ever seen that movie, btw?  “Big Fat Liar” ?  It’s what made me fall in love with Paul Giamatti.)

I wanted to let B & S pick out coordinating colors for their room since they will be sharing (yes, you heard right, the house is 4 bedrooms and my kids still have to share a room.  DON’T ASK), but that is proving difficult since they don’t have matching bedding.  I feel bad because I told them they could help pick, but now I’ve decided that I’m just going to pick one color that goes with both their bed covers.

Before I close today, I’d like to know if anyone has any advice on painting.  I know I haven’t really talked about it much, but I have some concerns and if you have any ideas on how to help me pick out color without needing to refill my Valium prescription, I’d appreciate you sharing.  Also, Come to our Painting Party!!  It’s Saturday, November 22nd at my new house, from 9 a.m. until whenever you have to leave.  We’ll have snacks and pizza for lunch.  I’d like to promise cold drinks, but that will all depend on the date we actually close and if I can get the fridge in before then.  But we’ll need to paint behind the fridge, so maybe I’ll just have a cooler of ice.  Whatever.  We will take care of you.  Just come and paint and make me less neurotic already, ok???


9 thoughts on “Snarker’s Block

  1. When I pick paint I just go with what I feel. When I look at the colors–I choose by how they make me feel. I have a red/maroon wall in my living room (which you can see on my post today) and I have a burnt umber one in the kitchen. I can’t explain it–the colors just make me happy and that’s how I choose. Sorry for rambling!

  2. That’s a whole lot of stress. My suggestion is you make your kitchen your favorite color and go more neutral w/ the rest. You can add accent colors in your furniture. As for B & S, I would still let them choose – even if it’s two colors YOU pick, but they get to choose from. (Really I would let them pick and not care that it co-ordinates, but I know that’s hard to do when you’re putting so much effort into making it look nice. Just remember, this is exciting for them too and they want to be apart of it.)

  3. My advice…find an “inspiration piece”. A pillow or picture or something that has the colors in it that you love. Pick a neutral out of the piece for your main colors and then one or two bolder colors for accents. That way, you don’t have to guess about the colors going together, you can already see that they do from looking at your inspiration.

    I wish I lived closer…I’d love to help you out! Call me if you need to and I’ll help however i can!

    What an exciting time! Congratulations!

  4. OK, paint. You can do one of two things. The first one is free – Just go pick up like 10-15 paint chips of the color(s) you want. Then tape them all together to form a big, square-like shape. Then tape that to the wall. You can move it so it’s next to the carpet, or move it to where the light hits, whatever. You can do this with multiple colors and see which one you like most (speaks to you) as you walk by it every day.

    The other thing costs a little, but not much. For $5 each, get a quart of the color you want, and paint splotches on the walls, and again, wait a day or two to see which one you like.

    If you’re painting over dark colors, primer is a must.

    Cheap paint sucks. Don’t do it. It’ll fade, come off when you clean, won’t go on as smooth. Boo to cheap paint.

    Semi-gloss all the way.

  5. I agree with both drama mama and the wiz. I went to Lowes and Home Depot and got a crap load of free paint sample cards in the colors that I liked from other things…like a painting I had or something. Then I used them to see it at different times of the day in different areas in the room. After I narrowed it down to two I bought the littlest can and painted it on a board that was larger than the sample but small enough that I could move it around. And I hated the colors after that! Back to the store, more free paint samples…and now I love my pea green and brown bathroom that still isn’t quite done! By the way, paint isn’t permanent! You can change it, eventually. Good luck!

  6. Well, ya know that I JUST became an expert at painting and then when that was failing me, an expert at hiring a painter. The paint samples are wonderful. Also, if you go to Lowe’s (because Home Depot doesn’t do it anymore), they have those $3.00 samples of paint in the colors that you like and then you can try them on the wall. But if you are interested, I have some paint leftover if you want it! Hahahaha!
    Oh, yeah…Everyone come to the painting party! I will be t here, so that is one reason to come and I don’t want to be alone painting with Sally. She is too anal to deal with painting.

  7. Semi gloss is a must! You still have to be careful with the magic eraser though! If you are anal about painting, get one of those edger painter things from Home Depot. It is red and has square pads you put on it and it has two little wheels. You run it along the edges and then you don’t have to have a steady hand with the paint brush. Practice first! As for color, be careful with yellows. They are super hard to judge and often don’t look like you wanted. If you want a soft buttery yellow, often a light beige is best. Good luck!

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