I’ve been hearing and seeing commercials for www.ok2talk.org. It’s a website that is trying to get young people to open up and talk about their feelings. Incredibly, in this day and age mental health issues still carry shame and a stigma that make it hard for people with these issues to come forward. Ok2talk is a safe place you can go to make a tumblr expressing your feelings, and has a helpline number for those in need of immediate help. 1-800-273-TALK (8255). This is the one I created:
“I have felt ugly. Alone. Afraid. FAT. Helpless. Depressed. Worthless. Sad for a reason. Sad for NO reason. Abandoned. Scared. Hopeless. Embarrassed. Screwed up. Overwhelmed. Exhausted. Insecure. Neurotic. Emotional. Out of control. Lost. Confused. Angry. Bitter. Jaded. Terrified. Wanted to run away. Wanted everything to stop hurting.
I wanted to die.
But I’m doing better.
I reached out for help.
It’s SO hard. You don’t know how to do it. It’s embarrassing to admit. You just want someone to know how you feel and rescue you, but YOU have to save yourself.
And you can do it! You are worth it!
And keep asking. Don’t stop.
Dying is permanent. It’s not like the cartoons, you don’t come back after 5 minutes.
If you need that break that you think dying will give you, go to the hospital. They’ll take care of you there.
People care. People that know you. People you don’t. Strangers. Doctors. Teachers. Family. Friends. Police. Counselors.
You have to believe them when they say you have worth. When they say you are friendly, or funny, or smart, or talented, or whatever it is that you are that’s GOOD. Because it’s true.
I know it’s uncomfortable. To be complimented. To receive positive attention.
It’s scary to make the choice to save yourself. Maybe you’ve tried before. I did several times. It’s exhausting. It is overwhelming to keep trying. But I promise, eventually it will stick.
“But what if it doesn’t last?”
It’s ok. You did it once.
You can do it again.”
If you know someone who suffers or needs help, please encourage them to come forward and share their voice. The more there are of us to stand together, the stronger we are. I’m so grateful to my many friends who have stood by me through my journey. You have reached out and let me grab hold when I was in despair. I know that God has placed each of you in my life. If you feel you have not done anything special, you are wrong. It was special to me. Thank you. <3