Sucking It Up Now

I have a pretty amazing group of people in my life.  There are just certain people (mostly women, sorry guys!) who consistently do and say things to help me feel good about myself.  If you are reading my blog, you are likely one of those people so give yourself a nice smack on the butt for me.    If you don’t think you are included in that bunch, you have two choices:  1 – Pretend you are and give yourself the smack or 2- You ARE and give yourself the smack.

No one can ever replace Ana Banana, but I’ve got Shana the Beautiful and my cripple rock star Mom who are 99.99999999% as awesome and many, many other dear friends (who, sucky for me, do not live anywhere remotely close!) that each have a spark of the Spirit of Ana in them and will help me feel like she’s still here.  It would help more if one or more of you picked up and moved within 80 miles of here, but I’ll take what I can get.

Love to rowdy girls everywhere!!!

 

Clearly the Worst _____ EVER.

• Best Friend; because try as I might, I have an anxiety attack every time I see another status update about the impending doom move.  Pathetic?  C’est moi!
• Mom; because when I did the grocery shopping today I picked candy to hand out to trick-or-treaters instead of the food on my list we need for the rest of this week.
• Student; because I forgot my sweater and scarf this morning and it was soooo bloody cold that I couldn’t manage to wait 50 minutes outside for my next class of the day and went home early.
• Visiting Teacher; because even though I know I would not have made it the past few years without my second mom (a.k.a. Visiting Teacher!) – I still never manage to get mine done.
• Wife; because I always forget to thaw out whatever it is that I need to make a nice dinner for my husband who works so hard and we end up having a lot of “find it and eat it” dinners.

Good thing I see my therapist tomorrow.  She’ll tell me of course I feel like crap, I haven’t been giving myself good self care.  Yeah… that will make me feel better.

 

Signs of the Apocalypse

You know about my food/mess/germ issues, right?  I don’t like to be (or get!) messy or dirty, and I don’t touch raw meat because, EWW!

This afternoon, we carved pumpkins.

I cleaned off all the seeds so I could roast them with cinnamon and sugar.

I AM STILL ALIVE!!!

Start checking to see if the moon has turned to blood and the four horsemen come riding to town, I hear that happens next.

It Snows 11.5 Months of the Year in Montana!

I hate to cry.

The snot comes forward, the face gets full, suffocation begins and splotchy-ness ensues.  Noses are blown, boxes of tissue are emptied, and pillows are soaked through with the tears of hurt/anger/frustration/loneliness… the worst one is the loneliness.

I hope you’re sitting down, because I am about to tell you something that will shock you to the core:

I don’t have very many friends.

Are you still there?  Everything ok?  Good, let’s get back to me.  I have a personality so fabulous that Shana the Beautiful calls it “the full monty” when it reaches its peak of awesomeness.

Ana Banana is moving away, and now I can’t stop crying.